Castiel Meets Torchwood
by Mancuso
Summary: The team captures a fallen angel and Jack wants to keep him prisoner in the hub for unknown reasons. Torchwood/Supernatural crossover. I'll give you Jack/Ianto, but all other pairings are a surprise.
1. Captured

Note: Everything else is currently on hiatus because I'm totally fixed on this idea right now, and like I said before, I can't commit to anything. So here we go. I don't own Castiel, Kripke does. I don't own the Torchwood characters, Russel T. Davies does.

* * *

When Castiel landed he was frighteningly alone. He'd expected to be dropped in a field, sure, but this was less than a field. It was scorched earth. Nothing would ever grow there, let alone a monument for the grace of an angel. He was to have no tree, it looked like. And that troubled him, because that would be his last reminder of ever having been an angel of the Lord.

And if he was dropped into the field along with his own grace, then was he being given another chance? He stood up, brushing the soot from his behind, and looked around. His grace would've been quite visible were it there with him for there was no brush, leaves, or any other vegetation to hide it. So, basically, WTF. And on top of it all, it was suddenly occurring to him that he could remember every bit of his life as an angel. _That _couldn't be right.

He was shocked to hear the sound of his own voice when he found himself squealing at the unexpected assault from behind.

"I've got him, Tosh, but the GPS's seemed to go on the fritz. If you could direct me back to the SUV?"

More dry, brushing foot-strokes against the burnt soil and he was accosted on both sides.

"I'm here, Owen, you can ease up. God, you're twisting his arm. No wonder he's making such a horrible fuss." She took the reigns, more gently than Owen, and Cas found himself and his footing as he was walked forward, following the man who first attacked.

"I'm terribly sorry about Owen. He doesn't know his own strength sometimes, wiry bugger."

"Who are you?" Cas choked out, finding the feeling of his own voice much louder in his head than he had when he was still the omnipresent messenger of God. He was no longer above his mundane fleshy body. He was down in it.

"We're Torchwood." Gwen and Owen spoke simultaneously.

"Oh, you always get to say it. Why don't you let me have a go at it once, eh?"

"Stop your whining, Owen. Tosh; we're coming up on a burnt out log. How far are we from the SUV?"

"Well, then where's Jack? Didn't he say he'd meet us up between here and the car with the gear?"

"Excuse me…" The fallen angel interjected.

"And Jack's got his panties in a twist because WE'RE not on time?"

"E-excuse me…?"

"Jack? Is that you? How long've you been on the wire?….Yeah well I don't give a shit what you heard. Where are you?"

"Owen, leave him be. He wouldn't have abandoned us unless he had a damn good reason. Isn't that right, Jack?" Gwen snarled.

"Excuse me!" Cas finally shouted.

"What!" The two shouted back.

"My name is Castiel. I am a messenger of God…er…..well, I was, until just now. But I still claim the authority to interrogate. If you are who you claim to be, where are you taking me? Are we in London?"

"God no." Owen laughed. "And I'm not surprised you know about them. They weren't exactly under the radar. But we are. This is Cardiff. Will you go willingly, or are we going to have to sedate you? Because if _you_ are who _you _claim to be…then we know that you don't exactly have a life to return to. And we have questions that need answering."

"You and me, both. You've wasted centuries studying things that don't really exist." Castiel spoke calmer now."And you've spent your whole life serving someone who doesn't exist."

"Owen, really. Go easy on him, eh?" Gwen put a soothing hand on the former angel's lower back as she gently pushed him on. "He doesn't yet know."

"Know what?"

Owen sighed and looked back over his shoulder. "You don't know….that God doesn't exist. I mean, he did once, but he burned out long ago. God is dead. And you….you are not his child. It breaks my heart to tell you this, but you are in fact an alien. Your God was a great ball of energy."

"Oh, I don't doubt that we are alien to you. And I know that God is nothing but energy and love and grace." Cas stumbled over a rock, twisting his ankle slightly. Gwen held him up and took little notice of his hobble as they trudged on.

"Love? Maybe. I can't really say, because Love isn't exactly scientific, is it?" Owen's tone was cruel. "Imagine a star. A great big star not unlike our own Sun. Well, actually, I lied. Very much unlike our Sun, because, you see, this star was special. This star had a mind of it's own. It was a great consumer, it was. But much more than that, even, it was a converter, and so a producer."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"No, of course you don't. But allow me to enlighten you."

"Owen, please. Save it."

"Enough, Gwen, he needs to know." Owen resumed his story. "As I said, the star was a producer. A converter of energy. It could take energy and turn it into matter. It created the solar system. More impressively, it created you gorgeous beings. And us. Humans. You see, you were a prototype of sorts. You were created on another planet. We could never know which one, but rest assured it wasn't in this solar system. And there were many of you. You weren't a failure, you were just too many. And so 'God'…" Owen signed with his fingers. "'God'…decided to take a handful of you away. And that was when he created the solar system here. And you were to work under him as over-seers of his new creations; the humans. As far as you knew, there was nothing else out there. Never was. You see…since 'God' had control over all sorts of energy it was quite simple for him to erase your memories. You've never seen him, have you?"

"That doesn't mean anything."

"Oh, that's right." The human grinned, heading towards the SUV which was now in sight. "Because of Faith. Faith justifies all of God's shortcomings, don't it?"

Gwen held onto the fallen angel's arm as Owen unlocked the vehicle and opened the door, helping her to get him inside.

"Will you cooperate?" Gwen asked, straightening his tie for him.

"I will." Cas nearly spat at her as she reached around him, buckling him in and warning him not to mind the gadgets and gear surrounding him. She then got into the passenger's seat, buckling herself in before Owen took off.

"If you know so much…" Castiel sighed, watching the scorched ground turn to small scattered tufts of grass that gave way to shrubs and eventually a full-fledged forest with a narrow trail which was just the right size to carry the vehicle through. "Then tell me how it ends."

"How what ends?" Owen asked. "The story? Happily ever after, of course." he snorted.

"No…I mean the world. You can see the past, surely you can see the future. If it's all just some ribbon, time, and you really do have the power to jump from time to time and place to place, then you should know."

"Oh, that's not us." Gwen corrected. "Sure, it's possible and it's happened to us before, but we don't have any control over it. We don't know anyone who does. Jack's been all over the place. Jack was there when the world ended. But he sits on all of that. Good luck getting him to talk. He hasn't even told us."

"Well, aren't you taking me to meet him?"

"Yep. Providing he's at headquarters." Owen rolled his eyes. "Which he's likely not, since that's where he's supposed to be."

"I'm looking forward to meeting him, then." Castiel nodded. "And after that, you'll let me go?"

"Uh…sure." Owen smirked.

"We'll have to see what Jack says." Said Gwen, as reassuringly as she could manage with such uncertain news.

_

* * *

_

Afterward: This chapter is short compared to the next few. Yes...I have them already written. See? I'm not that horrible.


	2. Introductions

Cas kept quiet for the first half of the trip. He actually found himself enjoying listening to the friendly banter between Gwen and Owen.

"Are you companions?" He found himself asking.

"We work together, yes. But you already know that." Gwen said.

"No. I mean…Are you together?"

The two looked at one another and then at the angel in the rear-view.

"No. Why?" Asked Owen.

"I don't know. You seem to really like one another."

"We're friends." Gwen shrugged.

"We fooled around for a while before, but we're past that, now."

"Owen!"

"What? It's not like he's going to get you in trouble with the man upstairs. There is no man upstairs, remember?"

Castiel sighed. "It doesn't matter. My God didn't care much who people slept with."

"Oooh. Past tense." Owen teased.

"I've fallen. I don't quite know how else to speak of Him."

"What exactly….did you do in order to fall?" Gwen dared to tread.

"Nothing. It wasn't a punishment. It was a decision."

"But why?"

Owen looked over at his partner. "Gwen. Remember what Jack said. Save the interrogation. He wants to be there to hear everything."

"Oh alright. Although I don't see why he should always be the one to have all the fun."

One thing was for certain: Cas wasn't finding any of this to be very fun in the least.

**********************

"I don't understand why I'm being imprisoned. I told you I'd cooperate."

"We understand. Really, I am sorry. We just have to take every precaution. It's not personal, it's protocol. I'll be back in a few minutes with Jack when he gets in. Then we'll take you to the interrogation room. You'll be much more comfortable there. Well….depending." Gwen gave a short and awkward wave before turning and leaving Cas.

In her absence, the cell across from his had become visible along with it's detainee. Castiel had never seen a weevil before. He'd never seen any sort of alien before. As far as he knew they didn't exist. Torchwood was an angel bedtime story and aliens, well….aliens were just out of the question. At least, this was what the higher ranks had always reported. It was getting harder and harder for Cas to know what to believe. It was playing on his doubts. He was susceptible, after all, he'd just fallen from grace. Perhaps this Torchwood was just a gang of rogue demons. Out for themselves. Perhaps it was all a trick.

"He-hello…" He found himself speaking aloud to the creature across from him. He was certain it wasn't human, but he thought it might talk back. It was wearing clothes, anyway.

The weevil raised it's upper lip in a snarl that couldn't have been taken for a greeting by anyone but Castiel.

"I see they've captured you, as well. Are you….are you like they said? Are you an alien?"

The weevil dragged it's knuckles along the floor of the cell as it inched towards the glass, pressing it's face against it and expressing itself in growls and groans.

Castiel could make no sense of the language.

"But that can't be right….The Tongues…"

"Ooh, what tongues?" Came the upbeat and hysterically excited voice of the Captain.

"Castiel?" Gwen announced, leading a very tall and very sharply dressed man by the arm towards the fallen angel's cell. "Meet Jack Harkness."

"That's Captain Jack Harkness." The man smiled. "And what a pleasure it is meeting you. You are…every bit as angelic as I expected."

"This is a vessel." Cas explained modestly.

"Well great taste in 'vessels.'" Jack smirked. "Although, I feel a little bad for that poor attractive man you're wearing. Tell me…when you go out on the town, do people ever dump red paint on you?"

"Excuse me?" Castiel could no longer decode witticisms on his own. He no longer had access to The Tongues, and he was relying solely on the basics of the English language; knowledge granted over the course of his fall.

"You're possessing that man. How long have you been inside him?" Jack was all seriousness one moment, and then in a fit of giggles the next. "That sounded dirty. Let me rephrase. Is the owner of that body still present?"

"He died long ago. The body now belongs to me. I've fallen from grace."

"So I heard. Gwen, open the cell."

She did as she was told, and before he knew it, Jack was in the cell with him, behind him, and there were cold metal objects being locked onto his wrists.

"What's this?"

"Oh, don't worry. It's just to get you from the holding cells to the interrogation room. I promise I won't try anything."

Castiel could hear the smile in his voice. He was proud of himself for this new development. Reading humans seemed to be getting easier and easier.

"Although, I do recall saying that very same thing to a boyfriend of mine, once. Boy, was he surprised."

**************

The interrogation room wasn't much cozier than the cell, but at least there was a chair. And not only that, but there was the ever-reassuring green eyes of Captain Jack Harkness only three feet across the table from him. As nervous as the man made him considering the circumstances, Cas was constantly being soothed by the caress of those eyes. Much more calming than the snarling stare of a weevil.

"Okay." Jack began. "We'll start with why you fell."

"Where's Gwen?"

"I dismissed her. Her man is sick, so I sent her home to take care of him."

"Owen?"

The Captain smiled at that."No. You know about that?"

"He told me."

That surprised him. "Really? Must be your eyes."

"What do you mean?" Cas asked.

"Nothing. Just…I'm doing everything not to tell you my whole life story right now. You look very…open. Like you're a good listener."

"Patience. That's all it is."

"Yeah, well, get ready to kiss that goodbye. If you're going to become human, you don't have the time for patience. Mortality's a bitch."

"I just want to go back…" He dropped his gaze to the floor between his knees.

"I understand. But first, you have to tell me why you chose…_this_."

Castiel sighed. "I chose this because it was getting harder and harder to wait around just to see the face of the one I'm supposed to be so loyal to. I mean…as far as any of us knew, He may've abandoned us a long time ago. And after so many years…centuries…of loving Him….the uncertainty. It wasn't worth it. How dare He ask so much of us. Especially when there's nothing for us. Nothing after life. When an angel dies, it's nothingness for them. There is no after-life. Consciousness of every sort ceases to exist. We don't have souls."

"And now…you do?"

"Now, I am physically manifest. The next step….after death, is conscious manifest."

"But that's what you were before."

"But I'll have a soul. When I die…I'll go to Hell."

Jack shook his head in disbelief. "And you want that? Why?"

"Because it's better than not existing. Even if I become a demon after a century, it'll be better than not existing at all."

"I don't know about that." Jack sighed. "Do you know why you fell here?"

"No. I thought that I would just…wake up in the hotel room I was keeping. I don't know why I'm here."

"Let me explain." Jack began. "There's such a thing as a rift. It's time, essentially. At least…it's continuity. There are cracks in the rift all over the world, but they're all on the mend more or less. Imagine a condom."

Cas was surprised to find that he knew what that was.

"The condom has a few holes in it. That's never good, right? But it's alright, because we've slapped a few bandaids on all the spots that've sprung a leak. No pun intended." He grinned briefly. "Now, something will slip through every now and again, but nothing major. However, right there in the receptacle tip, there is a big gaping gash. The receptacle tip is Cardiff. And you, my celestial friend, you are a wayward swimmer. It was more likely for you to end up here than anywhere else. It was all chance."

"So when can I get back to him?"

"Who?"

"Before I fell…I was helping someone out. End of the world sort of business. I need to get to him so I can help him. I still remember what I was. My memories haven't been erased, so they must still need me for something."

"I'm sorry, but I'm afraid we can't release you just yet."

Castiel's eyebrows came together in a crease. "Why not? You said it yourself, I've become human."

"Well, that's true, but there's still a bit of red tape we can't cross. You see, it'll be a while before all of that heavenly aura wears off of you, and until then, you're just a big walking tank of energy. And energy attracts aliens. So for your safety as well as Cardiff's, we're going to have to detain you a while longer."

"Can't I call him? You have all this technology, you can track him down. Surely you have access to those sorts of things."

"I'm sorry. I can't risk that."

"But you don't understand!" Cas was becoming desperate. "This is the apocalypse we're talking about."

"Oh, I understand." Jack smiled. "But listen…I can promise you that the world isn't going to end any time soon. I'm telling you…I was there. Whatever this battle you were fighting was….I can assure you, you will win it."

Castiel wanted to believe him, and he did on some level. He didn't feel like he was being lied to. He couldn't perceive anything negative coming from the Captain whatsoever.

"This man you're helping." Jack tilted his head. "What's his name?"

"Dean."

"And how do you feel about him?"

Cas shrugged and examined the top of the table between the two of them.

"I care about him. I understand him and why he does the things he does. He's…a hero. "

"Describe him to me." Jack prodded.

"But I don't understand. I thought you wanted to learn about angels."

The green-eyed man smiled. "I do. I want to learn about you. You obviously feel very strongly about this Dean. So tell me about him. Make me understand why you feel this way about him."

"He's just…so human." Cas sighed. "After all he's been through he can still love and care. He's not numb to the world like most people would be after his life."

"Anything else?""Well, sure. He's an extraordinary creature. A true example of the beauty God can create."

"So he's attractive."

"I suppose. He doesn't look much different from you."

"And you fell…for him, then?"

"I didn't say that."

"No." Jack crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back in his chair. "But it certainly sounds that way."

"I wouldn't mind spending the rest of my human life with him, if that's what you're saying. And yes, it's always been in the back of my mind. Even before I decided to give up my grace."

Jack smiled in perfect understanding. "It's just amazing, really."

"What is?"

"That the power of attraction is enough to bring an angel down to earth for good. That love between two men can be that extreme."

"You make it sound so…"

"Gay?" The captain laughed. "Well, that's because it is."

"I suppose. But I haven't…"

"What? Known him in the biblical sense?"

"No, of course not."

"But I bet you've thought about it."

"Naturally."

"And does he want that?"

Castiel shrugged. "I don't know. And I don't plan on finding out. It's not something I ever intend to bring up. He…is attracted to women."

"Oh, that doesn't mean anything."

Castiel sighed. "It does. He's not attracted to me. To this vessel, I mean. I know he's not. I've seen it in his head. He likes me. He has the potential to love me. But it'll never go as far as…the bedroom."

Jack looked at the fallen angel for a moment before pressing a finger into the attachment in his ear. "Uh-huh. We're almost done here, Ianto. If you could maybe get some takeout so that our guest will have something to eat? I'm making it my personal project to teach him how to be human. First thing he should know: Pizza. Alright, thank you, Ianto. ….Yeah yeah." Jack laughed. "You'll get your tip later. I'm sorry, Cas. I can call you Cas, can't I?"

"Yes." He smiled politely. "You mean to make me your personal project? What all will that entail?"

"Just you wait and see."

**************

Cas enjoyed every bite of his lunch. He'd never had pizza before, but he knew it was one of Dean's favorites. He completely understood why, now. He met Tosh who was very sweet to him. She seemed ready to kiss his feet as he stood before her, and he wanted to take her hand, pull her up, kiss her, and tell her that it was all quite unnecessary and he was unworthy of all of it. He was no different from any of them now that he'd fallen. Ianto served him just as eagerly and Cas was immediately drawn to him by his faithfulness to Jack. He could relate to that. Even the subtle looks of complete adoration that passed between him and the Captain were reminiscent of his life as a servant of God. Then it occurred to him that Jack didn't only look at Ianto that way, he looked at everyone that way. The man's capacity to love was wide-spread. He'd looked at Cas the same way in the interrogation room just moments before.

"Jack." Ianto ventured, bending down to Jack's ear at his desk as the man watched the angel chat with Gwen and Tosh through the glass that was the wall of his office.

"Mmhm?"

"I was just curious. Um. When you said that you were going to show him how to be human?"

"Yes?"

"What did you mean by that?"

Jack tore his gaze away from the ex-angel and the women and looked up at his part-time lover. "You're concerned?"

"Should I be?"

"You're jealous."

"Perhaps."

The exchange went down too quickly to have revealed all that it revealed. Jack knew Ianto's feelings were in constant jeopardy. It was his fault. But he didn't know that it had already gone that far. That Ianto may already be in love with him. He had been hoping otherwise. Connections that strong were too painful for him and they always resulted in abandonment on either his part or the other's. And when it came to real story-book once-in-a-lifetime love, Jack's heart belonged to somebody else. Somebody who managed to steal the heart of everyone he met. Jack was simply one of his countless victims, and he'd be paying for it for the rest of his life. A completely unfair and unjust sentence.

"Just say the words, Ianto. If you don't want me to…teach him certain things, just say it and I won't. I owe you that sort of loyalty, don't I?"

Ianto couldn't agree more. "I won't ask anything of you."

Jack picked the Welsh's hand up off of his desk and kissed the back of it before gently replacing it. "Ianto...I never want you to feel threatened."

He pulled his hand away from the desk and stood upright once more, smoothing out the front of his suit. "Why not? Half the aliens we come across, you've shagged. What's one more? You don't want me to feel threatened? You once told me, with a gun pointed at my head, that you'd execute me yourself if I didn't murder my own girlfriend."

"Ianto…this is a complicated job."

"I understand." He sighed, smiling a sad little buttler's dutiful smile. "I only ask this; if you shag him…be considerate."

"Aren't I always?" Jack smirked. "I mean, come on. You can't deny that you, uh….come first when it comes to what we do in private."

"That's not what I mean, Jack. I'm saying…don't let him think he can have you, because he can't. Nobody can. And he doesn't deserve to be fucked over the way-…"

"Yes?" Jack raised his eyebrows, leaning back in his chair.

"Nevermind. Look. Just…don't hurt him."

The Captain blinked without removing his daring gaze from his servant. "I'll do my best not to."

Ianto couldn't take the glare very long and he dropped his own eyes to the carpet. "Thanks." he muttered and dismissed himself.

**********

Jack leaned against the rails, over-seeing Cas's physical. "Make sure you're thorough." He called down.

"Fuck you, Jack. I'm not sticking my fingers up there."

The Captain grinned and shrugged. "I'm just saying…he's in his mid to late thirties. He's ripe for a prostate exam."

"He just fell from the sky this morning. I don't think he developed prostate cancer between then and now."

"I'm sure I'm just fine." Castiel interjected.

"I need you to undress." Owen ordered.

Castiel began with removing his coat; something he hadn't done the entire day he'd been human. He just hadn't thought of it. He struggled with the tie, but Owen helped him to loosen and remove it. Jack sat down for the show, dangling his legs over the wall and resting his chin on the bar. It was while unbuttoning his shirt that Castiel finally learned the meaning of shame. Shame in the biblical sense, anyway. He was about to be biblically naked, wasn't he? It felt good, bare skin meeting cool air, but he felt the piercing stare of Captain Jack from above and he couldn't shake it for anything.

"Help him with his belt, Owen. He's stuck."

Owen grumbled, but complied. "Take your shoes off before you go trying to remove your trousers. You'll wind up shredding them."

Cas had to hop up on the examining table in order to get the shoes off. Then he unbuttoned his pants which was only a little bit difficult for him. He stood back up to slide them down, almost taking his boxers down with them before he felt Owen's hand on his arm.

"Alright, mate. You can leave those on. In fact, I'd prefer it if you did."

"Spoilsport." Jack muttered.

"He's a fallen angel of the so-called Lord, Jack. I don't think molesting him with your eyes is quite appropriate."

Castiel blushed and looked up at the Captain. "This really isn't my body, you know. I mean…I've inherited it, but I can't take any credit for it's aesthetic pleasantness. That is God's work."

"I thought you doubted." Jack said.

"I did. Force of habit. I credit everything to Him. Even when I don't believe it, myself."

"Now there you go." Owen said, planting the stethoscope against Castiel's chest, sending a violent shiver through him and causing him to gasp.

Jack gasped as well, eyebrows raised. "He felt that."

"Well of course he felt that. He's human."

"I mean…he _felt_ that." A sly smirk spread over his face.

Owen broke his concentration on the ex-angel's heartbeat to look a little to the south of the stethoscope. "Ow, bleedin' Christ, Jack. They're only nipples. That stuff happens when it gets cold."

"Doesn't make it any less exciting."

"I suppose you must watch, Jack?" Cas asked.

"Protocol, I'm afraid." Jack apologized.

"Is not. He's making that up."

"That's okay." Cas smiled up at him. "I feel better with you around."

***************

Cas' first night at the hub was quite peaceful. Gwen insisted that they allow him to sleep on the couch as opposed to in the cell. After all, he'd done nothing wrong. He was a circumstantial prisoner and they needn't punish him for anything. Jack said it was fine so long as Ianto stayed the night to look after him. Jack planned to finish up some work in his office where he could keep an eye on the both of them.

"Are you chilly?" Ianto asked.

"No, I'm comfortable. But where will you sleep?"

"Don't worry about that. Jack will find somewhere to put me up." He smiled a far away smile before continuing to whisk away all the trash and take-out bags and boxes which had accumulated on the top of the coffee table throughout the day.

"You care for him a great deal, don't you?" Castiel ventured.

Ianto paused for a brief moment, then seemed to shake the question off. "Who? Jack?"

"Who else. You serve him as though you're contractually bound. But…you aren't, are you?" Cas worried at first that he was taking too many liberties, but considering that Ianto really did seem to exist solely to serve, it couldn't have been too bold a thing to ask. If he were assertive in the least, he could simply decline to answer.

"I'm indebted to him just as everyone else is. He's saved my life on multiple occasions. If I could, I would do the same for him."

Cas smiled at him. "Empathy. For once, I can truly say I know the feeling."

Ianto smiled back. Even though he did see the fallen angel as a potential threat - no, a definite threat considering he was what he was and why wouldn't Jack jump at the chance to make love to an angel? - he also connected with him on a certain level. They weren't really that different at all. And perhaps Jack's affection for Castiel could be attributed to that.

"Goodnight, Castiel."

"Good night, Ianto." Cas got as comfortable as he could under the blanket on the cramped couch and closed his eyes, assuming that this was what induced sleep. Meanwhile, Ianto dumped his armful of garbage in a trash receptacle on his way up to Jack's office where he expected to be given any assignment ranging from photo-copying to ordering Jack a late-night snack. What he did not expect, however, was to be greeted with an immediate glomp and snog. He had to force Jack off of him in order to get his heart-rate back under control, he was so startled.

"Jack, what're you doing?!" He gasped.

"What do you mean? Same thing I do practically every night. Are you suddenly opposed to it?" Jack crossed his arms across his chest as though offended.

"No, it's just….well…yeah, I'm opposed to it. Tonight, anyway. Cas is right down there. All he has to do to see us is open his eyes."

"And..?"

"What do you mean 'and?' It's totally inappropriate. I get it, you're an exhibitionist. You're a bit of a swinger. I can live with that so long as you don't drag me into it. But I refuse to do anything with you in front of him."

Jack huffed. "And why is that, Ianto? Because you're afraid he might wake up and want to join us? What could he possibly say or do if he were to see us? He's an ex-angel, for Christ's sake. He can see the beauty in all of God's creatures. It's not like seeing your pasty naked ass is going to offend him."

Ianto cocked his head trying to figure Jack's reasoning for a brief moment. "Look…It's not about that, Jack. It's something much bigger."

"Oh?"

"You were so quick to get on me just a second ago. You're usually not that quick. And one can't help but to wonder why. Well I think I know."

Jack sat in his chair, shooting Ianto a patronizing look. "Uh huh? And why would that be? Because it couldn't possibly be because I was missing you all day. It couldn't possibly be because I'm incredibly horny and you look so incredibly hot in that form-fitting suit."

"It's got nothing to do with me, Jack. You want him to wake up. Not even for the thrill of it. You just want to get him hooked on you the way you hook everyone. You want him to see us together and envy me so he'll come running into your arms. Well, guess what, Jack. I like the bloke. I don't want to end up competing with him because you can't find a lay decent enough to satisfy you completely."

"First thing I've agreed with you on all night." Jack practically snarled.

Now that bit. That really stung. Ianto could feel the lump forming in his throat as his vision became blurry behind the rapidly forming tears. He was afraid that if he spoke he'd fall to sobbing, so he hastily turned to make his exit. Screw Jack. He could watch after the angel, himself. After all, it seemed to be what he had really wanted in the first place.

* * *

Afterward: Yay for angst. I'm totally warping the canon in both series, now.


	3. Ouch

For the first time in a long time, Jack helped himself to a drink of something other than water. He did sip sparingly on his scotch, however. Watching the obviously uncomfortable yet uncomplaining figure below toss and turn on the couch while inching more and more into inebriation, himself, he began to get it into his head that perhaps inviting the man/angel/thing into his office for the night wasn't such a bad idea. He had no bed to offer him because he never slept, but Jack was a gloriously innovative fellow. He and Ianto seemed to do quite well with what they were given around the hub.

He downed the last of his glass and made his way to the not-quite-sleeping form.

"Castiel? You still awake?"

"I don't know." Cas said, without opening his eyes. This made Jack smile.

"Well, I'll take your ability to respond to me as a sign of your consciousness. Try opening your eyes."

He corresponded, blinking rapidly to allow his pupils to re-adjust to light. "I'm sorry." He said. "I'm not quite sure how to tell when I'm actually asleep."

"That's alright. If you're not tired, you can come keep me company. I don't sleep, myself, and I can't imagine you really being tired what with all that energy you absorbed up there."Castiel sat up. "I suppose I'd know if I were tired, then?"

"Probably. Although, it's been so long, I don't quite remember the feeling."

"I'll come with you."

Jack extended a hand for Cas to take and helped him up to his feet, not letting go as he lead him up to his office.

"You're walls are made of glass." Cas observed.

"Why yes, they are." Jack smirked, opening the door and gesturing that he come in. "Is that so strange?"

"I don't know. I suppose it is, because…aren't the point of walls to enclose? For privacy? You can't keep very private in your office with glass walls."

"It doesn't bother me." The Captain hopped up on his desk and pushed his chair back with his foot, indicating that Cas should sit there, which he did obediently.

"Castiel. Fallen angel. Never been to a club. Never drunk a beer. Never eaten pizza or sucked face."

Cas smiled, content just listening to the Captain's voice. For the first time, with the exception of Dean, he felt a human being was equal to him in terms of wisdom and responsibility.

"Never had a boyfriend or a girlfriend." Jack went on. "Never been on a date or just shagged in the backseat of a cheap car."

"You could go on for days listing all the things I haven't done, Jack."

"True. It's a very long list." He confirmed. "But it doesn't have to be."

It was a moment before the look in Jack's eyes registered with Castiel as lust.

"Are you drunk?" He asked, noting the decanter and empty glass sitting on the desk next to Jack.

"Yeah, maybe. Do you mind?"

"I do if it's going to make you a threat to me. Angel, human, it doesn't matter: I'll still defend myself if circumstances call for it."

Jack was slightly insulted by that. Anyone else would've been largely insulted, but drink on top of Jack's already shameless personality put severe limitations on what could and could not offend him.

"Are you suggesting that I'd rape you?" The look on his face brought immediate relief to Castiel, for it showed that Jack was genuinely shocked at the implication.

"I don't know you, Jack. I don't know what you are or aren't capable of. You're extraordinary."

"I couldn't, anyway. I mean…I wouldn't."

"It's alright. I believe you."

Jack sighed. "I'm sorry if I come on too strong." Apologizing for such things was a first for him. His advances had never been anything less than welcome before. "It's just…there's one person in the entire universe who declines my…uh…invitations. I'm not used to…not getting what I'm after."

"Which is me." Cas ascertained.

"Quite."

"But why? Because I'm something new? Because I'm naïve? What is it with human men and their obsession with virgins?"

Jack broke a smile at that. "We have this inborn urge to take." He shrugged. "Hard to explain to someone who's never even had a proper snog."

"Jack, I don't plan on…_knowing_ you." Cas stated simply, a bit of a blush rising in his cheeks. He'd never imagined he'd make such a bashful human.

"That's alright. I wouldn't force you to do anything. It's just…there's something about you that reminds me of an old friend. I can't quite put my finger on it." he smirked briefly. "No pun intended. Perhaps it's the…naivety."

"Concerning?"

"Human things. Let's say….dancing, for example. I'm sure you've never danced in your life, have you?"

"No."

"You don't know the sensation. You don't know what it's like to be pressed up against another warm body, letting a rhythm and a harmony move you, losing yourself in someone else and a balance of caring and being cared for. I could never explain a feeling like that to you, and you'd never be willing to experience it. And even if you were, it'd never be with-…"

"Yes?" Castiel leaned forward in his chair expectantly, wrapped up in the Jack's almost too-close-to-home explanation.

"It'd never be with…well. It doesn't matter. The point is…I guess I'm just going to have to learn to behave." His melancholy smile did nothing to hide his true anguish. "For your sake. You're confused enough about this world."

Cas tilted his head in that way he'd always done before the fall. Even from the point of view of one, humans hadn't ceased to fascinate him.

"Jack. This person I remind you of?" He didn't need to finish the question.

"No, it's not important."

"It must be. You feel very strongly for them. Not only lust, though. Much more than that."

Jack looked to the decanter of scotch and considered pouring himself another glass. "There's no one else but him. I'll never…feel the same way about anyone else. And I can never have him."

"Why not?"

"Because he leaves people. He leaves everyone who ever falls in love with him behind because he's selfish. He can't take watching them grow old and die. But me…even when he knows that I can never expire…he won't have me, either. And when there's no excuse for his leaving, like in my case…well…that's when it hurts the most."

Castiel's eyes grew wide at the revelation of Jack's immortality. He wasn't sure if it was something Jack had purposely neglected giving away and he'd only slipped up, or if it even mattered that he knew. After all, if Jack was truly immortal, why would he even need to protect himself like that?

"You…can't die?"

Jack shook his head. "Talk about a curse in disguise. I'll spend eternity waiting for the one thing I can never have."

"You neglect to mention me." Cas said, trying to lighten the mood. "Are you still convinced you'll have me sooner or later?"

Jack chuckled a little, immediately cheered up by the angel showing a bit of wit. "Oh, I'm certain you'll come around. Eventually."

**************

Ianto's immaculate apartment had never truly felt like home to him. When he got in the door, he tossed the keys onto their designated hook, and then headed towards the bathroom to shower. He stripped out of his suit and stepped into the steaming hot water. He had no doubt in his mind that Jack had Castiel bent over his desk probably at that very similar moment. What was worse was that he knew just how the Captain fucked, and so it was easy for his imagination to concoct all sorts of mental images. He only hoped that they were using protection, because god knows, even after tonight, Ianto would never be able to keep his hands off of Jack. He'd forgive him in 24 hours, tops, and they'd likely be having the hottest and most emotionally charged- for Ianto, at least- makeup sex by 9:00 tomorrow evening at the latest.

In the end, Ianto knew that he'd give in to Jack. If Jack would have it, he'd apologize first thing tomorrow morning, coming into work. And if Jack had succeeded (and how couldn't he have) in getting the fallen angel into his metaphoric bed, who's to say he'd even have the time for Ianto tomorrow? The poor butler didn't think he could handle that sort of blatant rejection coming from Jack. This evening had hurt enough as it was. He had never known Jack to say things he didn't mean. Hell, half of Jack's personality flaws stemmed from his constant need to speak exactly what was on his mind without hesitation or forethought. What if he had truly meant what he said? What if he'd become bored long ago, and until this angel came along, was only occupying himself with Ianto for lack of anyone better?

By the time Ianto shut the water off, it'd been long cold. He stepped out of the stall, shivering, and dried himself off before pulling on his robe and heading to bed. Perhaps if Jack were really aware of how involved Ianto had become, he wouldn't be so careless. Ianto considered, for a very short-lived minute, telling Jack how he really felt. But knowing that the Captain would never return those feelings was enough to squash the entire notion. Ianto, it seemed, was never to get what he wanted. From someone as inconsistent as his boss, how could he ever expect to? One minute the man was jamming his tongue down his throat, and the next he was ordering him to mop up a large puddle of weevil vomit. What they had was not love, on Jack's part, it was just sex. Very _very _good sex, but nothing more. If wasting him meant reuniting with whoever it was Jack seemed to be on stand-by for, Ianto had no doubt in his mind that Jack would slit his throat without hesitation.

* * *

Afterward: Man, everything is being a real bitch to upload. My format keeps getting all jacked. So there may be some sentences that read funny or flat because they were meant to have italics in them, but don't. Because it's retarded. Bleh.


	4. Tisk Tisk

Castiel's second day at the hub was slightly less miserable with the exception of the stiffness in his neck. He'd woken up that morning in Jack's office chair. Jack had talked him to sleep in the middle of the night, and had accidentally woke him while trying to maneuver around him to get into his desk drawer. Jack ordered Chinese takeout for lunch and everybody had a good time trying to teach Cas how to use chopsticks. Cas decided that he liked shrimp fried rice a great deal and when everyone else was done with their food, he offered to take care of the leftovers. Ianto watched him with great curiosity.

"You've really never tasted food before." He stated, staying behind at the table with Jack and the fallen angel. Everyone else had already relinquished their canisters over to the bottomless pit and resumed work.

"No."

"Look at him go." Jack mused. "You're going to make yourself sick. Especially if you're not used to eating at all."

"You're one to talk." Ianto rolled his eyes. "You shovel food into your face like it's competition."

"I have a quick metabolism."

"Says your love-handles."

"What's a love-handle?" Cas asked around the tail of a shrimp.

Cas had managed to remain blissfully ignorant concerning Ianto and Jack's tiff the night before. They hadn't exactly made up or even talked about it to one another. They were just ignoring it. Ianto was grateful, in a way, for Jack's going on as though it'd never happened. But on the other hand, it only showed how flippant the man really was when it came to their relationship. Jack either didn't take Ianto seriously, or he was willing to let him go on account of the new potential shag in the hub.

"Never you mind, beautiful. Eat your shrimp." Jack smiled sweetly at Cas before getting up and pushing his chair in. "Remember to wipe the table, Ianto." He spoke as the two watched his swift and sashaying rear end make it's exit. It was hardly a second before Ianto's firm grip found Castiel's arm in the middle of an attempt to bring a fork-full of rice to his lips.

"What happened last night?" The Welsh human demanded.

"What do you mean?" Castiel's eyes were wide and innocent as he pulled back from the assailing hand.

"I mean…you didn't let him, did you?"

"Let him _what?"_

Ianto sighed. "You went up to his office last night. That's where you were, still asleep in his chair, when everyone came in this morning. What did the two of you do?"

"He talked to me. He was drinking alcohol, and he talked to me. That was all. I fell asleep while he was talking."

"….he was drinking?"

"Yes."

"Oh my god." Ianto retreated back into his own seat, staring down at his hands as he folded them in his lap. "And here I thought I hadn't had the least affect on him at all."

"What do you mean?" Cas asked.

"Nothing. Just…thank you." Ianto leaned in and planted an awkward and unexpected kiss on the side of the baffled angel's face. There was a bit of embarrassment for him, but not for Cas who just watched him curiously as he stumbled over himself to get up and begin cleaning.

***************

"Jack." Came the voice of Gwen from just inside his office door."Yeah?"

She closed the door behind her and came around to lean on his desk. "Can we talk?"

Jack looked up from his papers, grin on his face. "And talking is code for…?"

"It's code for talking, Jack. I'm being serious. What the hell is going on here?"

"What do you mean?"

Gwen sighed. "Jack…I talked to Tosh and Owen. And I talked to Castiel. Cas said we're making him stay here because he can't leave until the cosmic or celestial energy or whatever the hell you called it wears off."

"Uh huh. Point?"

"Tosh and Owen said his energy rang normal on the meter. So I don't know what you've got up your sleeve, but if that man is safe to go, we have no right to keep him here. I don't know if this is a part of your plan to get him into bed, or what. But it's not okay, Jack." Gwen was so angry she was shaking. Leave it to Gwen Cooper to find some flaw in the humane goings on of Torchwood.

"Gwen, relax. I promise that there's a very good reason I'm keeping him here."

"Oh yeah? So why can't you tell us, then, oi?"

"I can't because it's complicated. But believe me…when the time comes, you'll learn. And you'll be grateful."

"What the hell does that even _mean_?!? You can't speak cryptically all the time and then expect us to trust you! We don't know anything about you and the only things we've heard from those who've been involved with you in the past was that you can't be trusted."

"Gwen. As your boss, I'm ordering you to drop the matter. I want you to look after him. Make sure he gets everything he wants. Maybe take him to a movie or something."

"So now you're saying he's allowed to leave the hub?"

"Yes." Jack raised his eyebrows. "Are you going to fight with me on it?"

She chewed the inside of her cheek. "No."

"Have him back by 8:00 tonight. I found an old cot in the basement that he can sleep on." Jack pointed to the corner of his office where the contraption was folded up.

"You mean for him to sleep in here again?"

"It's not your business."

"Jack…"

"Dismissed, Gwen."

"No, Jack, hear me. I don't want him getting hurt on account of you."

Jack was obviously exasperated with the whole conversation. "And what makes you think I'd want to do a think like that?"

"Just…be careful with him."

"Maybe I'll set up surveilance in my office so you can monitor."

Gwen rolled her eyes and left him. She was way past tired of his secrets and sarcasm.

* * *

Afterward: So, if anybody's reading because Castiel is in this, you probably don't understand any of this, which works. Because you know as much as everyone other than Jack does. But for those of you who watch Dr. Who and Torchwood, you probably have a better chance of guessing why Jack wants to keep Castiel around. I'm having so much fun with this story.


	5. Trigonometry

Castiel enjoyed the movie a great deal once he got past the over-stimulation coming from the large screen and the very loud speakers. He liked Gwen a lot and he felt comfortable asking her for clarification whenever something related to pop culture came up in the film. At one point, Gwen had actually blushed and refused to explain to him why the word fudge-packer was so funny.

By the time they got back to the hub, everyone had seemingly gone home.

"Jack!" Gwen called. "Got him back in one piece!"

Jack came out to meet them, assuming Gwen would opt to leave then and there. "Did you feed him?"

"Burger and chips." She affirmed. 

Jack noted the ketchup stain on Castiel's t-shirt. "I see." he smirked. "Looks like we're going to have to find you a change of clothes."

"Taken care of." Gwen handed over a brown paper bag. "I stopped off at the flat and found some of Rhys' shirts that'll be a little too big, but it's not really a huge deal as long as you get him some jeans or something. I can't see him being too comfortable in one of you or Ianto's get-ups."

Jack took the bag and peered inside. "Well…alright. But I've actually already sent Ianto out with his measurements." He looked at Cas. "I told him I wasn't sure what you'd be most comfortable in, so there's no telling what he'll come back with."

"You doubt my capability, Sir?" Ianto's timing couldn't have been better. He had three bags in one hand and a suit in plastic draped over his shoulder, two boxes of shoes in the other arm. Gwen came to his aid immediately.

"Well. Looks like somebody gets to play runway diva for my amusement tonight." Jack harped as the two heaped the bags and boxes onto the sofa. Ianto's quick glare did not go unnoticed by Jack. 

"Well, I'm off, boys." Gwen gave Ianto a quick kiss on the cheek, then Cas, and moved to do the same for Jack who had to stoop down in order to make the endeavor possible. "Goodnight, Gwen. If you get home and Rhys actually waited up for you, do something nice for him."

"Oh, you're wicked." She smirked, waving as she excited the hub.

"And then there were three." Jack crossed his arms, smiling at the two of them. Ianto found it hard to smile back and Cas was still getting the hang of his fine motor skills and could never quite tell if he was smiling or not.

"Well, if I may be dismissed…" Ianto started. "There's a Monk marathon coming on tonight, and I haven't set up the DVR.."

"Can it, Ianto. Don't make excuses to leave, I know things are strange between us lately, but I thought maybe it'd be best if we talked together. The three of us."

Truth was, Ianto really had been looking forward to the Monk marathon, but his DVR was actually all ready to go. Had been for two days now. Ianto loved his Monk.

He sighed. "Alright, Jack. But I don't really see what there is to talk about. You want Cas. So have him. Who'm I to get in your way?"

Castiel cleared his throat a little, finally finding it in him to speak up. "Don't my wishes count for anything, here? Ianto, I told you I didn't intend to sleep with Jack. And you…" The once-angel looked up, addressing the Captain. "You have got to stop torturing Ianto. Can't you see what you're doing to him? He's in love with you, Jack. You can't see that?"

"What?!?" Both Jack and Ianto gasped simultaneously.

"I most certainly am not." 

"No, I wouldn't allow it."

Castiel shrugged. "It's true. So if you want to spare him, you either lay down some ground rules and really talk about this affair as though it weren't something you have him sweep under the rug along with everybody's crisp crumbs, or you end it, Jack. Because I've only been here a short while and you're already beginning to give me anxiety."

Jack and Ianto blinked at Cas before finally daring to look at each other.

"Be honest, Ianto." Jack ventured. "Is what he said…true?"

"That I…?" The butler had to look away. "It may be. It hurts enough."

Jack sighed. "I do care for you, Ianto. But I'm just….I'm the wrong kind of guy for you if you're looking for commitment and exclusivity. It's just…not who I am."

"And you can't change?!" Ianto spat. "Oh, but I bet you would if it were for _him_!"

"For _Castiel?_" Jack lifted his eyebrows in confusion.

"No! For _him._ The one you disappeared with that time before. The one you're constantly waiting for. Sometimes I feel like he's the reason you don't sleep. You're always on your toes, prepared for him to come for you again. But he might never come again. And truth is, you must not be very important to him if he treats you this way. And you know it."

"Shut up!" Jack shouted, tearing at his hair, in pain at those harsh words.

"Enough, both of you." Cas interjected. "Ianto…Jack obviously can't give you commitment. Would you settle for any less?"

"Seems so, yes." Ianto muttered, crossing his arms and examining the crack in the floor under his feet.

"And Jack? You'd settle for Ianto…you'd let yourself be happy with him despite this other man? You'd put him first so long as this other person isn't present?"

"I already do. Well…I did. Before you."

"And…" Cas sighed. "What can I do to get you to agree to these terms? Suggestions?"

"Well…" Jack began. "This all started because of my newfound infatuation. Maybe if I were allowed to indulge in it a bit, I'd settle down some? You know…just to get it out of my system."

Castiel shook his head. "I'm going to assume you were joking. What about you, Ianto?"

"Actually…." the butler had a sly look on his face. "Jack's idea wasn't half bad. If we could just get you out of the way, as he said, out of his system…"

"Out of the question. I simply couldn't."

"What? You don't find us attractive?" Jack asked, teasingly.

"_Us?_" Said Ianto.

Jack smirked devilishly at his Welsh lover. "Sure, why not share the love?"

"Well now the idea sounds positively grand." Ianto looked to Castiel with just as wicked a grin as Jack's but who could have known whether he was truly interested or just trying to win his man back. "So you _don't find us attractive, then?"_

"_I didn't say that. How would I know, anyhow?" Cas stammered, backing up into the coffee table and nearly falling backwards over it._

"_Oh, you'd know." Said the Captain. "There's your man, Dean. You find him attractive."_

"_That's true. And perhaps I am attracted to you both, in a way. I'm still too new to this human thing. I'm not sure how to take a proper shower let alone make love."_

"_We'll teach you." Ianto soothed. "We'll be gentle."_

"_Oh, yes, we must be gentle. And, besides, there's two of us. What could go wrong?"_

_Castiel was obviously scared, his eyebrows were furrowed, there was a bit of a squint in his eyes as though somebody were trying to spray acid in them, and he was very obviously shaking. It was surprising that Jack was the one to put an end to it._

_He came closer to the ex-angel and put his hands on his shoulder, attempting to calm him. "Hey hey hey…it's okay." He looked to Ianto, communicating that they ease up without actually having to say a word. "Cas…chill out. Nobody's going to make you do anything you don't want to do."_

_Castiel looked at Ianto, who nodded his agreement with Jack. "Don't worry." he said. "I couldn't hurt a fly if it didn't hurt me first."_

_Cas sighed, closing his eyes and seeming to relax a great deal. "I'm sorry. I just don't quite know…I got this feeling. Like a surge of energy, but I didn't know what to do with it."_

"_Adrenaline." Ianto suggested. "Fear. It's the natural fight-or-flight response. It's a good reflex to have."_

"_But it was inappropriate?" _

"_Not at all." Jack smiled at him, releasing his shoulders, now. "Although, I do know of an efficient way to put all that excess energy to use."_

_Ianto raised an eyebrow. "But, jack…you said…"_

_The Captain smirked and turned to him. "Don't jump to conclusions. I was going to suggest he try on all those clothes."_


	6. Sex Is Violence

Disclaimer: I don't own Torchwood, Doctor Who, or Supernatural. The title of the chapter comes from a Jane's Addiction song.

* * *

When Toshiko, Owen, and Gwen came in the next morning they were surprised to find both Ianto and Castiel passed out on the couch; Cas, sitting upright with his head tilted over the back and Ianto with his leaning on Cas' shoulder.

"Well isn't this a sight." Owen stopped in front of them, crossing his arms over his chest. "I don't know if I want to take a picture or vomit."

"Oh, Owen." Tosh smirked. "I think they're cute. I am curious, however…as to what exactly happened here last night."

"They don't seem to be in any state of undress." Gwen observed. "And if Jack's about, that proves quite amazing."

"I'm about!" The Captain called down to them as he made his way to their floor. "And actually, there was a lot of undressing going on last night. Not that you're interested in my personal life." he laughed. "It's not like you swap dirt on me like trading cards when I'm not around. It's not like you ask everyone from my past if I've taken them to bed."

"Come off it, Jack. They volunteer that information themselves." Owen grumbled, proceeding to his station so as not to have to hear Jack's real explanation for why all three of them had spent the night at the hub. The other two, however, were now staring at him expectantly.

He grinned, leaning towards them and bending down to their level. "Why don't you wake them up and ask them yourselves." He suggested. "And then you can all get to work and I won't be forced to fire anybody."

"Oi, alright." Gwen groaned, moving to Castiel's side of the couch and stroking his hair. "Good morning, sweetheart. Time to get up."

The angel stirred into consciousness, blinking and looking about. Internal awwwws were had around the room.

"Good morning." he mumbled, smiling up at the three. "Hi Jack." His smile widened.

"Good morning, Cas. How does your neck feel?" The Captain felt like teasing.

"It's sore, actually."

"So…" Gwen began. "What's with you sharing your couch?"

"Hm?" Cas looked down at the head resting on his shoulder. "Oh. Ianto. He stayed the night." He wiggled his shoulder the slightest bit to wake him.

"Mmrm?" Ianto mumbled. Jack knew that was sleepy-Ianto for "don't wanna."

"Come on, Ianto." Castiel coaxed like a mother. "It's morning. I think you overslept."

"Gah." He finally opened his eyes and sat up with a stretch, he jumped at the sight of his co-workers standing around him in a semi-circle. "Oh. Good morning." He seemed a little embarrassed to be caught sleeping in, and he scrambled to stand up and ran off.

"Well…good morning to you, too…" Gwen raised her eyebrows.

"Oh, don't mind him." Jack came around to Castiel and sat beside him starting to straighten out the wrinkles he'd gained in his shirt while asleep and also to run a few fingers through his hair, partly because it was a little matted, and partly because he liked to feel it. "Ianto's definitely a morning person, he just doesn't like anybody seeing him before he's prettied himself up. That's precisely why he never spends the night here."

Tosh and Gwen were in hysterics at this.

"Oh, god, he's worse than me!" Tosh exclaimed.

"Me too! He's a perfect lady, in't he?" Gwen chimed in. "But I can understand. I'd get a little anxious if I was without my vanity in the morning. Oh, god. I bet he's freaking out. He hasn't a change of clothes, has he?"

"I don't think so." Castiel rubbed his eyes. "Last night wasn't exactly planned."

"Yeah, about that…"Gwen crossed her arms. "So, what exactly _did_ happen last night?"

"Go on, tell 'em, Cas." Jack grinned, patting the fallen angel on the head.

He shrugged. "We just…tried on clothes and then played charades. And Jack cheated. Even though he knew I was already at a disadvantage since I haven't exactly been on Earth for very long." He seemed genuinely sore about that which all present found pretty cute.

"I wasn't cheating. I just happened to be around for a lot of pop culture that you and Ianto missed out on. Not my fault I'm extremely cultured."

"Aged, I'd say." Ianto joined in, finally re-emerging, magically transformed somehow, even with the same clothes from yesterday. He looked fresh, and everybody, except Jack who knew him better, wondered how he'd done it.

"Like a fine wine." Jack smirked. "Just get more and more delicious with time, don't I?"

"Until you turn to vinegar." Tosh added.

"And as we've all witnessed…" Came Gwen. "You've passed your expiration date on multiple occasions."

"Oh, whatever. Now, everybody get to work or you're all fired."

************************

That evening, Jack proposed to Gwen that perhaps she should take Castiel home with her to spend the night.

"No way, Jack! Out of the question!"

"Why not?"

"Because! I'm tired of having to bring my work home with me! It isn't fair to Rhys. Besides, you remember how he reacted when he saw _you_ for the first time? Imagine how he'll act when he sees Castiel! That's a gorgeous piece of flesh he's walking about in, Jack. Not to mention he's bloody adorable in everything he does and even Rhys will probably want to coddle him. I don't even want to _think_ about opening _that_ can of worms!"

"Gwen, please. If you won't do it, I'm going to have to ask Tosh or Owen. And Tosh'll definitely agree to take him, but we can all guess why and I'm not sure I want her getting her claws into him."

"What claws? Christ Jack, It's not like he's the last fudge-cicle in the ice-box. And she's not _that_ desperate."

"Still." The Captain concluded, pained that he was actually forced to use a one-word phrase that basically expressed nothing except that he had no proper argument. But that's how he felt about Cas.

"So why can't you ask Owen to do it?"

"Well.." Jack sighed. "I guess I could, but I just don't want to put the poor man through that."

"Which poor man?"

"Castiel. I mean…we haven't even told him about Owen's condition. I don't think he could handle it. And if he were to spend the night with him, it'd almost be inevitable that he'd detect something."

"You're right." Gwen concluded, seeming to finally be thinking it over.

"So…you'll do it, then?"

"You better love me for this, Captain Jack Harkness."

"Oh, forever. You know it."

Gwen shook her head and laughed. "The things I'll do for a man in silk."

"Amen, sister."

They high-fived and Gwen was dismissed.

*********************

Castiel liked Gwen's apartment a lot. "It's so much less….drippy than the hub." he observed, sitting on his knees, looking over the back of the couch at Gwen who was in the kitchen preparing dinner.

"Yes, that's a way to describe it." She laughed. "You can turn on the telly if you like."

"I don't think I know how."

"Here, I'll show you." Gwen came around to the front of the couch, digging into it to find the remote, and then handing it to Cas. "Press the power button. It's at the top."

"Okay." He searched the button out and pressed it, turning the television on. He was immediately sucked in to the weather channel, which was what Rhys had last programmed it to. Gwen noticed and thought it was kind of sweet how he could be entertained by the weather. The forecaster was attractive, she supposed. But what did Cas care for that? He was actually absorbed in the show for the weather.

"You know, we do have other channels. Just use the arrow buttons to change it if you get bored with this one."

Cas may not have been bored, but he did change the channel, perhaps to get the feel of how to work the buttons. He eventually landed on something called MTV which had him so red-cheeked and flustered, he dropped the remote. "I'm sorry!" he cried, bending down to scoop the remote back up and change the channel as quickly as possibly in order to get the bouncing breasts and asses off of the screen. Meanwhile, Rhys was just walking in the front door to witness all this.

"So, Gwen." He grinned. "This is your angel buddy? And he has a taste for rap music?"

"I…I was just….I didn't mean to…"

"Castiel, calm down." Gwen laughed. "It's quite alright. Rhys sometimes programs it to worse."

"Just wait until she goes to bed tonight. I'll show you the _really_ fun channels." he winked. "I'm Rhys, by the way. If that weren't obvious enough. Good to meet you." He went to sit a bag from the grocery store down on the counter before coming back to shake Cas' hand.

"Castiel." Cas said, smilingpolitely.

Rhys gave him a good once-over and then looked to Gwen who was busy chopping celery. "Handsome, in't he?"

"If you'd say so." Gwen bit her lip, knowing she was about to get an ear full.

"Awfully big eyes he's got, there. Not unlike the Captain, eh?"

"Oh, Rhys. If you find them so damn attractive then why don't _you_ pursue them. Heaven knows, I haven't the time."

Rhys laughed at this. "Oh, I'm only teasing. I know I'm the only one for you. Besides, Jack's no threat at all. He's gay, right?"

Gwen rolled her eyes and dumped the celery into the crock-pot along with the carrots and onions.

"So." Rhys went back to his grocery bag and pulled out a six pack of beer, removed two of them, and went to sit on the couch beside Castiel, offering one to him. "Beer sound good?"

"I wouldn't know. Never had one."

"Never? Oh…right. The angel thing."

"Don't corrupt him already, Rhys." Gwen scolded.

Rhys threw up his hands in surrender. "I'm not! I'm just offering him a beer."

To both their surprise, he took it. "How do I…?" He indicated the cap.

"Here. I'll show you." Rhys removed his keys from his belt loop and used the bottle opener attached to it to open both their bottles. "There you go."

"Thank you." Cas inspected the bottle a moment before bringing it to his lips and tipping it back. He drank a little of it before setting it on the table to stare at it some more.

"How do you like it?" Rhys asked.

"It's…interesting."

"Well that's a way to put it." Gwen snorted. "Next you'll be trying cocaine saying 'Hm. Now that was curious.'"

Rhys laughed out loud at that. "He'd be a right snow angel, wouldn't he?!?!"

Gwen couldn't resist having a laugh at that one, herself. Cas only stared between the two of them in confusion.

*********************

At the Hub, Ianto was still clearing away small piles of rubbish the staff had left behind over the course of the day. He was nearly done, but he should've been done at least an hour ago. And he would've been if it weren't for Jack who was up in his office watching him. He was doing that thing where he made Ianto feel as though he were right behind him, when really he was quite out of range. It was his eyes that did it. They'd stare hot spots into the man's back. And God forbid they make brief eye-contact, because that just slowed him down even more. It was hard to concentrate on cleaning when the sexiest man alive expected you to be in his office in as short an amount of time as possible for whatever it was he had planned. And knowing Jack, the possibilities were endless.

Finally, Ianto could look around himself and be satisfied that there wasn't a spot of spilled coffee or smudge of dirt in the place. He promptly made his way to the Captain's quarters.

"I've finished for the night."

"Good work, Ianto. You're dismissed."

Ianto only blinked at him. At first, he hadn't quite comprehended, and then he just hadn't believed.

"….Alright. Have a good night, Jack…"

Jack wallowed in the beautiful and completely crushed look on the man's face for a few seconds before breaking into a brilliant grin. "Ah, Ianto, you're so gullible. I was only joking. Get over here."

Ianto came at the man without hesitation, hardly leaving Jack any time to stand up and meet him. When their lips crushed together it felt like reuniting with an old friend. It'd been a considerable while- for them, at least- since they'd last made love. Ianto was ready to jump back in as though there'd never been any trouble. Jack was willing to let him.

"You're not wasting any time, are you?" Jack whispered, running his teeth over Ianto's jaw. "How do you wanna do this? On the desk…down on the couch…?"

"No."

Jack pulled back and looked at him, confused. "_No?_"

"No, Jack. Bed." Ianto was panting, trying to re-attach to jack, but the Captain wouldn't allow it until he got a clear answer.

"There is no bed here, Ianto…"

"Exactly." He tugged at Jack's fingers, nearly pleading with him. "Come to my place?"

Jack blinked in disbelief. "Really? You want to? I mean…you want _me_ to?"

"I wouldn't have asked otherwise."

"Wow. Yeah, sure, I'd love to. It's just…we've pretty much kept this thing confined to the hub until now. There was that date before, but that was a disaster."

"Jack…" Ianto planted a quick kiss on his boss' lips. "Shut up." He took his hand and lead him out.

It was the first time Jack had ever seen Ianto's apartment. It was very prim and tidy, as could be expected, but Ianto was in no hurry to give him a tour. He took him by the arm, rather, and nearly dragged him to his bedroom.

"Have you got stuff here?" Jack asked, watching as Ianto un-tucked the sheets from his bed, preparing it to be peopled.

"You mean…lubrication?" He asked, turning and sitting on the edge of the bed, beginning to remove his shoes. "Would you be upset if I said I did?"

Jack shrugged a shoulder. "I don't exactly have the right to be. It's not like anybody's being held to exclusivity here."

"I do." The Welsh reached into the drawer of the night-stand and pulled out a dainty and quite modest little tube. "I'm always prepared, although I did assume you'd have thought to grab your's from the office."

"You hadn't really given me the opportunity, you pulled me out of there so fast."

Ianto grinned, having nothing more to say on the subject. This let Jack know that it was probably time to cease the discussion and so he came to join him on the bed and began removing his own shoes.

Ordinarily, they'd undress one another, but they'd managed to make a game of it. Every article of clothing Ianto removed, Jack tried to match. They synchronized their undressing so that by the time they were down to their under-garments, they'd both worked themselves up so heavily from holding back from touching each other that they could hardly stand it any longer. Ianto reached over, looking at the Captain, and ran a hand up his thigh.

"I asked you here for a reason." He stated.

"Let me guess; Your pipes needed cleaning?"

"I'm serious, Jack. I want you in my life."

Jack pulled his legs up onto the bed with him and turned so that he could look straight at his lover. "I am in your life, Ianto. I see you just about every day."

"No, you don't understand. You're in my life with Torchwood. But that's not all I am. Well…I suppose, in a sense it is, but I don't want it to be that way. I'd like to have a life separate from work. But, as it turns out, even my love life is affiliated with Torchwood. I'm sleeping with my boss. And before now, he'd never even seen the place where I live. I want to separate this thing we have from Torchwood, Jack. I want to be able to take it other places."

Jack sighed deeply, taking Ianto's hands and pulling him around to face him so that they were both sitting cross-legged on the bed. "Ianto, I want you to understand something. It's hard for me to separate work and regular life because my life isn't regular. I can't ever have a normal life. Not really. Sex with you is a welcome respite, yes, but it's still not separate. You're my employee. Not my boyfriend. And even if we do allow ourselves the occasional romantic stay in your bed, aside from all we've done at the hub, nothing's going to change that. Let it be what it is. Try not to put labels on it."

"I'm going to be honest."

"So be honest. What could it hurt?"

"I want exclusivity, Jack. I want you to be in love with me like I am with you. And I know I can't have that, but you should know. Because you should suffer for it. If I have to, you have to."

"I do suffer." Jack said with complete sincerity. "Because I can't do it right. Because I can only hurt you, but I don't have the self-control to say no to you or myself."

Ianto sighed, scooting forward on the bed so that he was nearly in Jack's lap. He rested his head against the older man's chest and listened to his blood pump. "I didn't mean for this to become some big couple's therapy session. I just wanted you to know that in advance so we can get on with the night."

"But aren't you upset with me?" Jack lifted a hand to pat Ianto's hair and rub the back of his neck.

"Yes and no. I'm upset at the situation mostly. And…although it isn't on the surface, I'm angry. Upset expresses more reason. You can't be upset without having a good one. I don't have any right to be upset with you. Angry is a better word because I want to blame you for something you can't help. So I brought you here to tell you this…and to get it out of my system."

Jack listened to him, his curiosity peaked.

"Jack, once I've had you in my bed, it'll feel more like you're mine. Something I can take home with me at the end of the day. So tonight, will you let that be true? Can you just…succumb to me for tonight? Don't think of anybody else but me. And give me the reigns. I want you to suffer."

"I…" Jack stammered a slight, but detectable, bit. "I can do that for you. I'll let you be in control for tonight."

"Thank you." Ianto looked up and kissed his chin. "It's not that I don't feel like things are equal between us sexually. It's just that…tonight, I need you to be completely at my will."

"Yes, yes." Jack kissed Ianto's forehead. "For you, I will."

"Thank you."

Ianto laid Jack down on the bed and went to his closet, pulling out a shoebox and bringing it to the bed with him, removing the lid.

"What's that?" Jack asked.

"Things." Ianto was willing to give away no more than that. But he didn't need to, because the "things" were soon visible to Jack as the Welsh man laid them out on the bed before him. Silk scarves, candles, a…knife. The knife was the first thing to quicken Jack's pulse. The pistol was the second.

"Ianto…what's that for?"

"You promised me I could be in control. Are you going to take it back?"

Jack blinked in thought for a moment. "No…"

"Alright then. Lift your wrists to the headboard."

Jack did as instructed and Ianto tied each wrist securely to the bed-posts. He then moved down the length of the Captain's body and bound his ankles similarly. Jack was now completely helpless. At the mercy of a confessed angry Welsh lover.

"Do you trust me?" Ianto asked.

"That depends. Do I trust you to always show up to work on time and to do a satisfactory job? Yes. Whole-heartedly. Do I trust you not to hurt me? Right now, that's looking a little iffy."

"Jack…I mean, in general. Do you trust me? Yes or no."

"…Yes."

"Alright, then." Ianto took the last scarf and twisted it in his hands, making a gag of it. He leaned down and kissed Jack's perfect lips one last time. "This is your last chance to say no. To withdraw your surrender. Otherwise, all power will be relinquished to me for the rest of the night."

"No, I trust you, Ianto. Just…I want you to…know that I love you. Maybe not the way that you want me to, but I do love you. So keep that in mind before you do anything you may regret."

Ianto gave him a brief, sad smile. "Are you concerned for my safety or your own?"

Jack half-smiled back at him. "We both know that my safety is of no consequence."

"Thanks for your concern, then." he brought the gag to Jack's mouth, securing it between his teeth and tying it around the back of his head.

Ianto got up from the bed and placed the candles in their holders on the bedside table before striking a match and lighting all three of them. He then turned the light off and went to straddle the Captain, staring intently into his face for any signs of nervousness. He was pleased to find a bit of seductive challenge in his eyes. He lifted the first candle he'd lit - for it had gathered plenty of molten wax by now - and raised it up over Jack's chest, tipping it gently and allowing the smallest dribble to fall from the edge. Jack hissed through the scarf, and Ianto watched as his eyes squeezed shut. He bent to blow on the wax, watching it harden as he did. Jack watched also, teary eyes expressing the most beautiful relief. That was the good part, Ianto thought. That was Jack's reward. The relief at the end always made the pain seem worth it. Tonight was going to be Ianto's good part. Everything he'd put up with from Jack was about to be made worth it.

He peeled the dried wax away, the skin beneath a bright white, slowly fading into pink. Jack's nipples hardened as Ianto blew once more on the naked skin. He tipped the candle again, this time without holding back, allowing the entire pool of wax from the well of the candle to spill all over Jack's chest and stomach. He moaned through the scarf and the muscles of his stomach contracted while his torso twisted, only serving to send the molten river onwards to cover more skin. Ianto watched in fascination, blowing on the great lake hoping for it to cool fast so that he could peel it off all together and imagine it was the Captain's skin. Meanwhile, Jack was cursing at him through the silk, not to be heard.

********************

Once Rhys learned that the Angel had never slept on a bed, let alone a goose-down bed before, he insisted that Cas spend the night in their's.

"Are you serious?" Gwen asked. "I thought you'd be upset with me just for having him over, and now you're going to let me share a bed with him?"

"I didn't say anything about that." Rhys grinned.

"Well, Mister. There's not enough room on the couch for the both of us."

"Gwen. I mean _you_ can sleep on the couch."

"And where does that put you?"

"With Castiel."

Gwen recalled her statements to Jack earlier and screwed up her eyebrows. "Now that is just too ironic. You've got a thing for the angel, then?" She asked.

He just looked at her as if she'd completely lost it, now. "Of course not." He gaze shifted tt Cas who felt a little awkward being fussed over, so had chosen to remain neutral on the subject, then back to Gwen and stepped forward, speaking in a voice low enough so that only she could hear it properly. "It's just that…I like the bloke. If it were any other guy in the world, I couldn't get away with having a sleepover, you know? It'd be a bit too…fruity. But because he is what he is, it won't seem that strange to him. I ain't…gay for him, or anything, Gwen. Although, he does fill me with this strange paternal urge. Which is just _weird_ considering he's a grown man. Or…a grown angel. Or whatever it is."

Gwen laughed, covering her mouth. "It's the innocence. But I know what you mean. Alright. Have your little sleepover, then. I'll take the couch."

"Thanks." he kissed her and nearly skipped back over to where Cas was sitting. "Alright, mate! Looks like we win. It's boys night, eh? No girls allowed."

"Don't teach him to be sexist, Rhys!" Gwen scolded. "Damn," she thought. "This really does feel like having a child."

********************

That day at work, Toshiko had been assigned a bit of homework. Her and Owen had been sent out around noon to investigate a source of alien energy located in an abandoned warehouse. After scoping the place for nearly a half and hour, they came across what looked to be a blindfold attached to two tiny stones located where each eye would be were you to put it on. They hadn't discovered the use of it during the course of the day, and Jack could tell them nothing other than that the stones looked Ragnorathian. Come evening, when Tosh was home, having finished supper, and just getting around to open her bag where the blindfold was neatly folded and tucked away, the stones were glowing a beautiful magenta. She noticed that the moon, also, seemed to have a pink haze about it when she looked at it in conjunction with the day's find. She hadn't dared to try the blindfold on, yet, for you never could tell with these sorts of things whether it was meant to do good or evil. It was usually a safe bet that whenever an object as beautiful as this came into your hands, that it was meant to do good. But every once in a while, ill intent could be disguised in the most provocative ways. Tosh decided that she would try it on before settling down in bed with her book. After all, she wanted to be awake to observe any changes.

She tied the alien object about her head, snuggly, and then rested her head against the back of the chair. She concentrated on feeling any changes in her body, but she couldn't feel anything. Just heaviness. Like she'd suddenly turned to mercury. Liquid metal sinking deeper and deeper into the cushion of her chair. But she felt peaceful. Comfortable. And she didn't know it when she fell into an unnaturally swift REM cycle. The stones rolled in the cloth every which way, following the command of her own eyes beneath her lids. Something was coming into view through the haze the pink light of the stones created against the movie screen of her eyelids. It was blue. The contour of the object was becoming sharper and sharper until it was very clear that it was a large blue box. Sharper still, and she could see that it was a police box. One word came to her, then. "Tardis." Though she couldn't have known, no one could have known, her lips formed the word and she mumbled it out loud in her sleep. The door swung open and a tall, slender, wild - "wild?" But that was no description of physical appearance. Then again, so it goes with dreams. Some knowledge may be taken as granted - man appeared. He was looking about with complete awe and adoration in his eyes. He was quite striking and beloved. There, she'd done it again! How could she know such a thing? Simple; she _felt_ it and knew it for truth. And who was she? He was looking at her. Grinning this ridiculously exaggerated grin, causing the skin at the corners of his eyes to crease. He embraced her. Those long and thin arms were around her middle. Her thick, muscular arms about his narrow shoulders. Chest to chest, and she could feel three heart beats. Her own and the Doctor's. ("WHO?" ) And she felt the hair on her arms and the back of her neck stand up as she smelled the familiarity of him, rubbing the faintest bit of stubble on her chin over the smoothness of his cheek. "I really should shave." she thought to herself. "Wait…" She pulled away from the Doctor and looked down at herself. She knew that chest, those long legs, those shoes. It was Jack. _She_ was Jack. She was the Captain. And their surrounding were suddenly coming into view. They were in the hub. And there _she_ was. Toshiko, herself. Standing beside Gwen, Owen, and their most recent guest, the angel. And they were all as surprised to see the Doctor as she - her Jack-self - was.

There was a flicker in the image. The doctor, the hub, the Tardis, and everybody else…they were fading out. What was this? A Shetland pony, trotting around the perimeter of a white picket fence. Her mind had completely abandoned the first dream, putting it out of thought until morning, when she'd be free to access it as a very faint and fuzzy memory. But she'd remember the feeling of it. She'd remember that for a brief moment she had _been_ Jack. Most importantly, she'd remember that the object had done something to her, for when she first put it on, she was not sleepy in the least. She'd have to record as much of the dream as she could and then submit it as a log to the Captain the next morning.

******************

Nearly an hour and a half had passed since Ianto began his play with the Captain. Jack was now completely nude, having had the majority of his body covered in wax and then peeled smooth. He had gotten quite used to the hot wax on his skin. It didn't hurt as much as it had the first time. The entire length of his torso was blotchy and pink from being scalded and Ianto hadn't thought to neglect a certain nether region of his body where he was probably the sorest about now. Even though the Captain had found it just about impossible to become aroused - let alone be able to stay that way - Ianto seemed to be enjoying it enough for the both of them. He'd done away with his own boxers by this point and had to stop his work on Jack every now and then to give himself a little encouraging stroke. His stamina was impressive. Jack had long ago deduced that the finale of the night would probably be a face full of Welsh-stock baby batter. He was in for a bit of a surprise.

His eyes squeezed shut every time Ianto dragged the serrated blade over his skin. He wanted to watch. He kept lifting his head and staring intently once the metal met flesh, but the pain always caused him to close his eyes like a knee-jerk reaction. He peeked at the expression on Ianto's face and he was truly happy for him that he was finding some sort of amusement in all of this. At least somebody was enjoying themselves. He had these thoughts. But at the same time, he was also happy to make a sacrifice for the man. He did love him. He'd never lied about that. And Ianto deserved to get what he wanted for a change.

His blood was running all over the place. It seemed like quite a lot to Jack, who really was in the dark as to what Ianto had in mind for him. He worried for the sheets; they looked expensive, and they were doubtlessly spotted and splattered by now. Ianto bent his head to Jack's skin and licked a river that had pooled in the trough formed in his chest between his pectorals. Jack shuddered at the sight of his pale little Welsh lover darting the blood up from his skin looking for all the world like a vampire. Like he wasn't actually playing a sexual game with the Captain, but rather, harboring his death. Jack toyed with that idea. Occupied himself so that when Ianto brought the blade to his throat, right on top of his throbbing artery, he was hardly aware of it. Naturally, as soon as he caught on, the throbbing quickened, and Ianto could feel it through the handle of the blade. There was a small animal whine in the back of Jack's throat and it sounded even more pathetic once filtered through the silk. Ianto pitied him, but that couldn't stop him. It still had to be done. There was no death for Jack. Not ever. Only rebirth. And why couldn't Ianto have something like that? He wanted to bathe in blood tonight. And by tomorrow, he'd be a changed man.

Jack screamed when Ianto reached his arm back, as if wielding an axe instead of a serrated kitchen knife. In an instant, it had become completely clear to him what Ianto meant to do. His arm came down with an incredible force and with great precision, landing just on the right area of Jack's throat. Jack screamed and screamed and he sounded so alien and inhuman, because Ianto had never heard anybody in such a frightening position scream before. It was a little contemptible, for who was Jack to be screaming for his life? He had an endless supply, hadn't he? Blood spurted like juice from a squeezed cherry tomato. It made a perfect spatter across the right wall of Ianto's bedroom. It continued to spurt out, jolt after jolt, first hitting lower down on the wall, then, like a fountain; shooting up, cresting, and falling to splatter on the hard-wood floor. Closer and closer to the bed until Jack had completely bled out, the wound began to close, and he was dead, already beginning the cycle of regeneration. Ianto didn't regret a thing. He didn't worry about the blood drenching everything in his bedroom. That was something he could think about later. For now, he was just going to breathe the smell of it. Jack's blood. His life. He could taste it in the air. He'd never felt so close to the Captain. Not even when buried deep inside him or vice versa.

He sat, perched on top of the corpse. Waiting for him to come back. Only briefly did a small jolt of panic surge through him. Perhaps he isn't coming back this time. But reason told him otherwise. Of course he was coming back. The Captain couldn't die. It was as simple as that. He watched the way a spider watches its prey as it hesitantly puts the first leg into the web, then the second, third, and so forth until it's so panicked it twists every which way, capturing itself.

Finally, Jack jerked up against his bonds, groaning in a breath through the gag, then coughing into it wildly, tears spilling from is eyes. Ianto wasn't sure what kind of tears they were. They could've been tears from pain, tears from fear, tears from relief, or tears from heartbreak which was what Ianto was hoping for.

He waited for Jack to settle back into regular respiratory pattern before reaching back and taking the pistol in his hand. Jack's eyes widened, but he didn't scream this time. Perhaps he'd figured out that it would do him no good.

"Jack…I'm going to take the gag off, but I want you to promise not to scream, okay?"

Jack nodded.

"Because I have neighbors, Jack….and if they hear you scream they may call the police."

Jack nodded more vigorously, ensuring that he'd be good and he definitely would not scream. Ianto untied the gag with one hand and removed it, watching the Captain as he stretched his mouth out, getting the feeling back in it. "Ianto…you're worried about me screaming…but what about the gunshot?" He finally asked, after the tingling sensation left his cheeks.

Ianto smiled at him. "You assumed I was going to shoot the gun?"

"I assumed you were going to shoot _me_. You already killed me once tonight. Which was very painful and horrific for me, by the way."

"Oh, I was hoping it would tickle, Jack." He rolled his eyes.

"I'm afraid I just don't understand. You _killed_ me. Do you hate me that much?"

"Not at all, Jack. I love you_. _I told you, I wanted to make you suffer. I can't do it any other way."

"The blood…" Jack was just now noticing. "It's…_everywhere._"

"Yes. It's a rather unfortunate mess." Ianto agreed. "But it was so much fun making it."

"You're…really fucked up in the head, Ianto." Jack wasn't trying to be mean to him. He was just observing, really.

The Welsh man shrugged a shoulder. "Well, if anyone had ever cared to ask."

"So…you're going to shoot me? Do you have a silencer at least? Because the last thing we need is for the police to show up just as I wake up from being shot in the head."

"I don't plan on shooting anybody, Jack. It's not something I want to do. I just want to teach you something."

Jack watched his shaky hand lift the pistol, first pointed straight at him, and then Ianto turned it and brought it to his temple. Jack was instantly tugging at his restraints, trying desperately to break free. "What are you doing?!?! Put that down, Ianto! Christ! Is it even loaded? Just….put it down!"

"Jack, stop shouting. Just…calm down. I won't pull the trigger, I'm not stupid."

"Really? Because putting a gun to your temple when your plan is to not shoot anybody doesn't seem very smart."

"I'm testing you, Jack." He brought the gun back down again, resting it on his lap. "Was it familiar, though?"

"What do you mean?" The Captain asked, heart beating a mile a minute.

"It didn't remind you of the time _you held a gun to my temple and threatened to kill me? That didn't come to mind at all?"_

"_I don't see the relevance. That was before we even started this thing, Ianto. I hardly even knew you back then. None of us really did."_

"_But do you regret it?"_

"_Yes! Yes, for Christ's sake! Can't you untie me, now! I just…I just want to end this thing."_

"_Well punishment isn't meant to be pleasant, Jack."_

"_I don't even know what I'm being punished for."_

"_You know. And you agreed to it."_

"_Well I think I've paid well enough for whatever it is, Ianto. This…isn't what I thought tonight would be."_

"_Not quite as romantic as you'd hoped?"_

_Jack sighed, dropping his head back down against the pillow. "You wanted me to suffer. I have. I don't know how to make you believe that it was enough."_

_Ianto smirked. "The fact that I've weakened the Captain to the point of begging is proof enough for me." He began with Jack's ankles, unbinding them, and then his wrists, but as soon as he was through, he felt the strong arms of his captive reach around him and suddenly the roles were reversed. Ianto found himself beneath Jack, on his back, pinned and staring up helplessly. "This wasn't part of the agreement." he stammered._

_Jack bent to kiss him. "I know. I was just going to suggest that we change the sheets before…anything. The smell of blood is making me sick."_

"_Really? I was rather enjoying it."_

_TBC…._

_AN: Sorry it's been so long since I've updated. I didn't have internet for a while due to new computers and trying to get something other than dial-up, which apparently I can't because I live in nowhere-ville. _


End file.
